How to Handle Feedback Like A Pro

But let’s face it, the word has baggage. For many, it triggers anxiety or defensiveness—like an alert that criticism is about to land.

This week, during a call with my speaker group, I saw this play out firsthand. Each week, one member speaks for 10 minutes on a new topic, and afterward, the group offers feedback. As the critiques started coming in, I watched the speaker’s smile slowly fade into a look of disappointment. The feedback itself wasn’t necessarily wrong—that’s the purpose of the group—but the tone and delivery were harsh, almost deflating. It was a reminder that feedback isn’t just about the content of what you say—it’s about how you say it. Feedback, when delivered poorly, can shut someone down; when delivered thoughtfully, it can lift them up.

But what if feedback wasn’t something to dread? What if, instead of being a measure of what’s wrong, it became a lens for growth? It’s not the word that needs changing—it’s how you view it.

And here’s where the idea of feedforward comes in. It’s not a replacement word or something you have to say—it’s a shift in how we think about feedback. Instead of dissecting what went wrong, feedforward focuses on where you can go next. It’s not about fixing the past; it’s about creating the future.

A New Perspective on Feedback

Feedback and feedforward aren’t opposites—they’re complements. Here’s how to rethink feedback and infuse it with feedforward energy:

1. Feedback as a Gift: Think of feedback like being handed a flashlight. It shines a light on areas you couldn’t see on your own. Add feedforward, and now you’re not just illuminating the past—you’re mapping out a path forward. 

    

2. Feedback as Collaboration: It’s not something done to you—it’s a conversation. Feedforward takes that conversation a step further by asking, “What’s next?” 

    

3. Feedback as Fuel: Feedback gives you the why, and feedforward gives you the how. Together, they propel you toward better results.

How to Embrace Feedforward

1. Ask for Suggestions, Not Criticism: Instead of “What did I do wrong?” ask, “What can I do differently to improve?”

    

2. Reframe Your Approach: When offering advice, lead with possibilities: “Next time, you might try…”

    

3. Adopt a Growth Mindset: See every conversation as an opportunity to learn and move forward.

So, the next time you hear “feedback,” pause before your mind races to the negative. See it as a moment of possibility, not a punishment. The word itself doesn’t need rebranding—just your relationship with it.

And if you’re the one delivering feedback, remember this: your tone matters. The way you frame your words can either inspire someone to rise to the challenge or leave them feeling defeated.