“Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.”
– Dr. Seuss
Goodbyes suck. They’re inevitable, often unexpected, and always uncomfortable. Yet, they’re a universal experience, a part of our lives. Whether you are parting ways with a place, a moment, or a person, saying goodbye is an emotional milestone that can shape your path in profound ways.
Supertramp’s song “Goodbye Stranger” perfectly captures this bittersweet essence. The song speaks to the fleeting nature of relationships, the ephemeral connections that define us for a time before fading into memories. These goodbyes, whether anticipated or abrupt, leave an indelible mark on your heart and mind.
The Weight of Farewells
Endings often come with a sense of finality, a realization that something cherished is slipping away.
It’s not uncommon to feel an overwhelming sense of loss during these times. The person you are saying goodbye to might have been a constant in your life, a best friend, a confidant. Their departure can feel like the severing of a part of your own being. In these moments, it is important to honor the relationship for what it was and recognize the growth it brought into your life.
Saying goodbye is a form of grief. It is the mourning of a connection, the acknowledgment that something meaningful has come to an end. This process can be as challenging as coping with a physical loss, stirring up a whirlwind of emotions. It’s important to give yourself the space to grieve, to feel the sadness, the anger, and the confusion.
Yet, within this grief lies the seed of new beginnings. Every ending paves the way for a fresh start, a new chapter waiting to be written. Embracing this perspective can help you navigate the pain of goodbyes, transforming them into opportunities for growth and self-discovery.
Finding Closure and Moving Forward
Closure allows you to process the end, to make peace with it, and to let go. Finding closure might not include getting answers to all your questions and it doesn’t mean forgetting; it means accepting the end and learning to live with it. This can involve reflecting on the relationship, acknowledging what it meant to you, and recognizing the role it played in your journey.
Moving forward, it’s important to focus on self-care and personal growth. Surround yourself with supportive people, engage in activities that bring you joy, and take the time to heal. Here are a few unconventional steps to help you through:
- Create a ‘F-It’ List: Instead of a bucket list, make a list of things you’re ready to do right now, in the next 3 months. It could be as simple as dancing in the rain, going on a staycation, or finally scheduling that guitar lesson. Use this time to tick off some of those things you have been putting off.
- Have a Goodbye Ritual: Create a personal ritual to say goodbye. It could be writing a letter to the person you are saying goodbye to and burning it, or having a simple ceremony to mark the end. Rituals can help in creating a sense of closure and moving on.
- Engage in ‘Future You’ Visualization: Spend time visualizing your future self, the person you want to become. Envision your life without the baggage of the past, focusing on the possibilities and opportunities ahead.
- Indulge in Art Therapy: Channel your emotions into creative outlets like painting, writing, or music. Expressing yourself through art can be a powerful way to process and release your feelings.
Are Goodbyes Ever Permanent?
One question that often lingers is whether goodbyes are ever truly permanent. People who were once central to your life can drift away, becoming strangers with shared memories. Yet, even as they fade into the background, the impact they had on you remains. The love, the lessons, and the growth you experienced with them continue to shape who you are.
Sometimes, goodbyes aren’t as final as they seem. Life has a way of bringing people back into your path when you least expect it. Other times, the farewell is indeed the end of a shared journey, leaving you with the task of moving forward while cherishing the past.
Remember that goodbyes, while painful, are also a natural part of life. They open the door to new possibilities, new connections, and new experiences.
In the words of Supertramp:
Goodbye stranger, it’s been nice
Hope you find your paradise
Tried to see your point of view
Hope your dreams will all come true
If you’re reading this, safe travels on your new adventure, Ray.
Remember, YOU GOT THIS!
Jasmine Rice is a Transformation & Confidence Coach, NLP Expert, Best-selling author, and Founder of Good Things Are Gonna Come, LLC. With a passion for empowering others, she has dedicate/d her career to helping people transform their thought patterns, and thrive during life’s complex transitions. Through her integrated coaching business and supportive community, she equips individuals with the tools they need to transform their lives and take control after periods of transition.
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