Emotional intelligence, a highly sought-after skill in the realm of self-improvement, is a product of significant personal growth. With this in mind, I have crafted this post to share the essential components required for the development of emotional intelligence.
It think it is important to note that emotional intelligence spans all relationships. It is a term used to describe the ability to recognize and distinguish between feelings and discern what feelings are appropriate or irrelevant to display. I recognize two things as being extremely important in developing emotional intelligence: 1) self-awareness and 2) applied self-control. Self-awareness and applied self-control are shown through one's ability to regulate emotions, manage impulsivity, express empathy, and be accountable.
Therefore, to support development of emotional intelligence, let's look at each of these elements individually.
4 Tips for Developing Emotional Intelligence!
I. Heightening Self-Awareness
To develop emotional intelligence, one must have a high level of self-awareness. Utilizing self-awareness in emotional intelligence encompasses consciousness regarding who one is and what experiences contribute to how one engages and responds to the environment and spaces occupied. Understanding how to engage and react to environments and people includes elements of self-control that provide one the ability to respond accordingly.
The core of emotional intelligence is one's ability to anticipate when one's behavior should be modified or what emotional responses are required to create healthy environments and encounters with others. Thus, the reference to "heightening" self-awareness rests in the intention to sit with oneself and reflect.
II. Managing Impulsivity
Managing impulsivity natrually follows heightened self-awareness because it also requires self-control. Self-control encompasses active self-assessment. This self-assessment, driven by self-awareness, is the key to recognizing areas for improvement. Therefore, self-awareness and self-assessment are fundamental components of self-control. Additionally, establishing and gaining control over one's behavior is vital to managing impulsivity.
Something else to note is that managing impulsivity is the same as one's ability to manage triggers. Therefore, the skills required mirror that of those I have spoken about in a prior post regarding managing triggers, which include:
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Understanding the root of the trigger.
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Recognizing the need to address and modify negative responses.
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Use healthy (adaptive) responses.
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Set boundaries to actively maintain healthy (adaptive) responses.
III. Exhibiting Empathy
When one is no longer fighting an inability to manage behavior, expressing empathy toward oneself and others is more manageable. Empathy speaks to one's ability to exhibit an understanding of not only individual emotions but the emotions (feelings) of others. Exhibiting empathy includes elements of social awareness, such as the ability to assess the environment and pick up on the mood of others while adjusting your mood to support healthy engagement.
Empathy is an evolution of the skills previously discussed. Empathetic people have high emotional intelligence because empathy involves connecting with and sympathizing with others' emotional states. The ability to juggle oversight and awareness of others' emotions while maintaining control over individual emotions is at the core of emotional intelligence. So, exhibiting empathy is relatively difficult to achieve and maintain.
IV. Accountability
The last tip and skill for maintaining emotional intelligence is accountability. Accountability in emotional intelligence speaks to one's ability to own emotions, decisions, and behaviors—essentially, the ability to refrain from blaming others. Through heightened self-awareness, one can uncover what areas they need to work on to gain complete control over their actions. Being accountable requires intentional effort. Accountability rests in refraining from justifying negative behavior or blaming negative behavior on others. Essentially, accountability in emotional intelligence means ensuring one's obligation to practice empathy, manage impulsivity, and be considerate and self-aware to maintain self-control. Each works in tandem to produce emotional intelligence.
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